Snowbirds

IMG_9705I was born and raised in the South and I haven’t ever moved away. I have visited other beautiful regions, but I wouldn’t want to live anywhere but here. I drink iced tea year round. I eat boiled peanuts from roadside stands. I sit in rocking chairs on the front porch to pass the time, and the front porch swing is one of my favorite places to be. I know all about blessing people’s hearts, and loving your mama. I also am a snowbird. For those of you who don’t know, that means I LOVE snow and will run into a storm rather than away from it. We are an interesting species…snowbirds flock together down here in the South. The past week has been a dream come true for us. We have some interesting behaviors that those who are not from the South find fascinating…so much so that every time we are active they make fun of us. However, one of our most endearing characteristics is that we could care less what anyone thinks…that and our ability to laugh at ourselves even as we flock to the stores for milk and bread. In the spirit of fun, here are some snowbird behaviors only folks down here will truly understand.

  • When a storm is coming we are giddy with excitement.
  • If it does not come as predicted, we complain about the weathermen as if they are personally responsible. Especially when they say there is a 100% chance of a heavy dusting. (Only in the South would that be a legitimate forecast.)
  • We do indeed rush to the store for milk and bread because we have been stranded at home without power before and know that milk on cereal for breakfast, and peanut butter sandwiches can last for days…no cooking necessary.
  • We also gather flashlights, charge phones and computers, chop extra firewood, pull out all the warm clothes, find the hats and gloves. (And sometimes this is more difficult than it seems because it has been YEARS since we last used them.)
  • We pray for snow and not ice. We hate ice.
  • When the snow is falling we post updates on Facebook as to how much is coming down, and where it is sticking.
  • You can almost hear the excited voices on the statuses…It’s sticking on the grass!!! We have ½ an inch!! The road is covered!! One hour since my last update…we have 1 inch now!!
  • We ask each other about the condition of the roads around town.
  • Pictures are posted of children in the snow, and dogs in the snow, and patio furniture in the snow.
  • We cannot always find our heaviest coats…so we layer all our clothes and top it off with a nylon sweat suit to keep warm and dry.
  • We wrap our children in layers until their arms stick out.
  • We build snowmen in direct proportion to the amount of snow we receive. Mostly they are tiny little men with raisins for eyes…but once in a while we get the chance to build a big one that gets a real hat and scarf.
  • We post pictures of our snow family members.
  • We measure the snow. We use rulers or tape measures. We take this very seriously. We compare our measurements and post pictures of them on Facebook as documentation.
  • We try to sled in any frozen precipitation that arrives because we don’t really know that sleds don’t work unless there is an icy foundation. Actually most of us don’t have real sleds with runners…we have round discs of plastic…or a cardboard box…or a trashcan lid.
  • When the sled doesn’t work we hook up kayaks or tires to the back of a truck and find the nearest pasture. (This only works for redneck snowbirds)
  • Snow angels are a must in the yard of every snowbird.
  • We make snow cream…with the MILK we bought at the grocery store.
  • We eat it until we get brain freeze.
  • As soon as the snow stops falling the guys find a reason to “go to town” so they can determine if they have what it takes to drive on snowy roads.
  • Wives tell them we bought everything we needed before the snow so we wouldn’t have to get out on the roads…but they go anyway.
  • Our dogs are either overjoyed to bounce around in the snow chasing every flake, or are afraid to go out to pee.
  • Our children laugh and giggle.
  • They don’t come inside until their hands and feet are frozen.
  • Our fireplace screens are decorated with multi-colored socks, gloves, hats, and coats of all sizes.
  • We make s’mores and drink cocoa for breakfast.
  • We have loud snowball fights. All family members are required to attend.
  • Sometimes we play in the snow at night, with head lamps on.
  • We break icicles off and pretend they are Popsicles.
  • We take pictures of snow scenes all around us, even though we know the pictures cannot do it justice.
  • We still think snow is pretty and beautiful and fun.
  • We stay in our houses mainly because we don’t have snow shovels, or snow blowers…they don’t sell them down here.
  • If our buses cannot run safely on the roads we don’t go to school.
  • Sometimes we even call school off before the weather comes because we know that it could be ice, freezing rain, sleet or snow…and our roads might become ice skating rinks that allow NO traction for southern tires. (They don’t sell snow tires down here either.)
  • Sometimes it is none of those things and we look foolish…but we don’t care about that if our kids are safe.
  • We play for all the days snow is on the ground, which is usually one or two.
  • We pack away all the snow stuff when it is over, and hope we get to use it again sometime in the next five years.
  • Snowbirds NEVER apologize for our love of snow because we think everyone wishes they had something in their life to be so enthusiastic about.

snow bella              Henry snowman

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